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09-Jul-2016 23:43

You fall into a routine and begin looping through familiar patterns, which can become less engaging over time.

For most people I’ve talked to, this usually happens within a timeframe of 6-18 months after the relationship begins.

It’s like trying to convince someone to play a game that they don’t want to play.

It’s not nearly as fun as finding someone who’s genuinely enthusiastic about playing.

Yes, you may get some teasing for it as a result, but so what?

Just tease people back for being so boring and vanilla.

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You can convert to an open relationship and enjoy D/s play with interested partners on the side.

This attitude shift is perhaps the single most important thing you can do to attract play partners.

Once you rid yourself of fear, shame, and guilt with respect to your interests, you’ll stop creating unnecessary resistance, and it will be so much easier to attract like-minded matches.

The truth is that most people are already into D/s. How many people automatically obey traffic laws when driving, without even thinking about it? You can always look for a group on, go to one meeting, and see if you like it.

They just don’t label it as such, and they treat it as a serious pursuit rather than doing it for fun. How many people go to work each day and obey someone else’s commands? So recognize that D/s itself is already immensely popular. But if people can enslave themselves to a company for pay, and if they can obey laws and social rules whenever they go outside, then surely there are people who’d enjoy exploring this popular mode of social interaction for fun, learning, and growth. Chances are you’ve already met someone who’d be interested in exploring D/s play with you, if only that person knew about your interest.

So this article is specifically for such people who’d like a gentle introduction to D/s play and some tips to get started.